Tender Mercies

Are you living your truth?   For the first 4 years of my marriage I thought I was spending my days doing what made me happy by running for fun and coaching ice skating. Quite frankly, I never wanted to be a skating coach. I remember when I was a pre-teen telling my mom that I never wanted to coach, but eventually it was just what I ended up doing to pay for my training. Coaching skating was a very good job to have during college, and I am grateful for the opportunities that I had when I was in Alaska. I wouldn't trade it for anything.  But coaching isn't all I am made of.  Recently you've probably noticed I've retired from coaching and switched my life a bit. In an email written to my mom and dad in March 2015, I wrote, in part,  All I truly want to be is a wife and mother. When I was in 2nd and 3rd grade I made posters in school when I was "star of the week." In one of the bubbles I had to write what I wanted to be. I always put a picture of m...

Swimming Babes-2006 " What do I do when I get pregnant again?"   I asked. My sweet cousin was on the other end of the phone call when I sought out her wisdom and support.  3 years younger than me, she is in her 3rd pregnancy and ready to deliver her first baby in less than 2 months. She was the first person I wanted to talk to when I miscarried the first time, just 2 months after her ectopic pregnancy back in the spring of 2015. For some reason, I just had this connection to her, like maybe because she was born in the same generation as me and going through similar circumstances, that she would understand. Now, 13 months after my first miscarriage, I find myself going through mental exercises every day to prepare myself to trust my body for my 4th and hopefully successful pregnancy; part of that exercise today was to call my cousin up and have a nice chat about our lives and try to get some insights. We were both strong-headed children growing up--often getting ups...