Tender Mercies

This was my first Thanksgiving that I hosted, which meant that I cooked the turkey. It kind of seems like a promotion in the kitchen or something. I've only cooked one other turkey in my entire life and that was only for my husband and I so the stakes were not high. This year, however, we invited friends over, so the stakes were a teensy bit higher, though not really because they are practically like family. Most Thanksgivings include lots of travel, cooking, family, noise, and commotion, and near accidents as well as love, laughter, and memories. We just were not feeling up to that this year, so we opted out of traveling and crowds and stayed home, sharing dinner with some close friends. Except for the near accident part. Everything was going well with the turkey. It was dressed and seasoned and in the roasting pan. After it had only been in the oven for 2 minutes we started to see smoke and then the three smoke alarms in our apartment started to go off, including the main ala...

This guy. I sure love him. Yesterday we celebrated 4 years of marriage by eating waffles for breakfast and then heading out on a lovely 6 mile hike at Clinton Lake. Surprisingly, this was the first hike we have gone on together since moving to Kansas...our bodies sure felt amazing as we walked in the fresh air outside. We ended it with some dancing in our living room to our songs and then a new recipe--Beef Biryani--for dinner. This year's song is Change Your Mind  by Sister Hazel. Marshall and I have both made some pretty big changes, for the better, in our individual lives this year and Change Your Mind  seemed to highlight these changes. The biggest change has been from me increasing my weight by 27% and regaining my fertility. It was so hard, but he stayed by my side and never let me give up. Through it all, I would often comment on how I wanted to be something else or be different, afraid that the changes weren't going to be good. While I do know tha...

This past Thursday, my heart was ripped out for the second time in 6 months . I felt betrayed. Alone. Emotionally drained. Afraid for "next time."  I felt like a failure, incapable of doing what my body was made to do. But then, after all of these emotions gushed out of me, I felt a peace sweep over me, unlike anything I had ever felt before. It was as if I knew  everything would be okay for me in the long run. Not like that is the answer I wanted in the heat of the moment, but it was still a comforting feeling that I wished I could bottle up for when my emotions went awry again.  I found out I was pregnant on October 26th. I knew I was pregnant even before I got two pink lines, so was elated when I finally got the positive result. I didn't tell any of my family, just two of my best friends. It was going to be my parents' Christmas present because I was going to be around 13 weeks by then, perfect timing.  The day after my positive test, I went in and g...

Last night I taught my first "unofficial" official yoga class! On Sunday I was asked if I would be willing to do a class for the 16-18 year old girls at church on Wednesday. Although I said yes right away, I was immediately nervous because I hadn't ever taught a class before. I wondered what I would teach, how I would fill up the time, if they would like it, and whether it would be too easy/hard. So many questions filled my mind, but I knew I had to do it, and I was excited nonetheless.  The day before the class, I put together an intermediate flow. I didn't want to make it too simple and slow because I was teaching teenagers and I know that I would have wanted a fast-paced class when I was that age. Here is what we did: Focus for the Class: Energize and Trust Begin in Sukhasana with right leg crossed in front Close eyes and take hands palms down to the knees.  Bring awareness to the breath  Place right hand on naval and left hand on collar bone Breath...