I saw this quote for the first time a week ago on my friend's fridge. When I see most quotes I think, "oh that's a nice one," and then go off and forget about it within a minute. Not this one. This quote really resonated with me and I couldn't get it off of my mind. I'm still thinking about it a week later.
Early on in my pregnancy my doctor told me that I "was at risk for preterm labor" because of my past history (i.e, a uterine septum that was resected). They scared me with these words because I was born nearly 6 weeks preterm and I didn't want to have to go through that for my own. I wondered if my body would be able to do this whole pregnancy thing, especially with my past three miscarriages.
Now, here I am, two days away from being 39 weeks and have had no sign of impending labor, nor do I desire to be induced.
Who am I, who wears a wristwatch, to try and counsel Him who oversees cosmic clocks and calendars? What do I think I know about telling my baby when she should come, when I ought to just let her be and decide when it is right for her? The funny thing is that the more I focus on when she will come and wanting her to be here now, the more disconnected I feel from her spirit. The more I trust in God and my baby's ability to be born, the more loving and intimate I feel towards my sweet baby.
It doesn't matter if others have their babies now and I have to wait a bit longer. I won't be pregnant forever. This is my journey, not yours. I must learn to be content with what I am and where I am on my journey towards motherhood, and not get caught up in what I think should happen.
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